One Big Ball of Emotions
Have you ever been really upset by something your partner did and decided to just let it go? It probably felt really good if you were able to really let go of the frustration and truly feel love for your husband.
Have you ever been really upset with him and tried to let it go, only to keep thinking about the issue while it festered? Eventually, this scenario leads to a huge blow up if you aren’t careful. It could be the slightest offense that sets off this eruption of emotions. Often it’s something that has nothing to do with the real issue that caused you to be upset in the first place.
Here’s the thing about emotions. We can try to stuff them all we want, but if we aren’t able to truly forgive and forget them, they will eventually surface.
I like to visualize a beach ball when talking about emotions. Pretend the large ball represents your emotion.
If you take a beach ball, and try to hold it under the water, you can do it for a while. However, eventually you are going to get tired, distracted or slip and that ball is going to come shooting up out of the water with a vengeance. This is like trying to resist an emotion. It will eventually surface and when I does, it is forceful.
Imagine holding up that beach ball front and center for an extended period of time. You could hold onto it, but it would block your view of other things in your life. It would constantly be in your way. You would miss out on so much as the ball would be a constant distraction at the forefront of your mind. This is like indulging in an emotion. It takes over your life and you cannot forget about it ever.
Now imagine being in the pool with the beach ball. You acknowledge it. You know it will come and go with the waves. It will float over and tap you on the arm occasionally and then it will bob away. It is there, you expect it, and when it comes you know it won’t last forever. This is what it is like to allow an emotion.
In any relationship, emotions come and go. If we try to pretend they aren’t there, they can creep in and explode at any moment. If we indulge in them, they overtake every thought and interaction.
What do you think it would be like to just allow any emotion that comes your way?
Would you be able to feel it, acknowledge it and explore the way you are feeling with curiosity?
Of course we welcome positive emotions and don’t need much help managing those, but did you know about half of your emotions will be undesirable? It’s just a part of being human.
As a part of you humanness, I challenge you to start recognizing and allowing your emotions. All of them.
Need help getting those emotions in check? Contact me here so we can chat!